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Zero-G canning tests

In space, no one can hear the tin open.

Sardine Aerospace · · 1 min read

We dropped four hundred cans from the cannery roof.

Three hundred and ninety-nine survived. The other one was lunch.

Method

Zero gravity is expensive, so we simulate it the traditional way: by throwing things and looking away. Each can was dropped, catalogued, and interviewed afterwards about the experience.

Findings:

  • Dents correlate with attitude, not altitude.
  • A can that survives the roof survives the re-entry paperwork.
  • Lids stay on. Morale stays in.

The review board asked whether a roof is a valid analogue for low orbit. We invited them to the roof. The question was withdrawn.

Next quarter we move to phase two: the lighthouse.